Eternal Sunshine of the Worry-Free
Mind
By
Alex Iglecia
Published in the Boston Women's Journal and
on selfgrowth.com
There are a number of ways of combating worry,
one of which is knowledge. A few weeks ago my
friend Katrina asked what she can tell her six
year old daughter about safety. About strangers.
About growing up safely. How would you approach
this question?
In Boston, we are very fortunate and privileged
to live in relative safety and security. Yet violence
is random and can happen at a moment’s notice.
My life doesn’t benefit from paranoia, and I believe
you would like to be one step closer to worry-free
too. Below are five quick tips to consider. Whether
for yourself, a child, or a friend, I think you’ll
agree that you can apply these ideas to increase
personal safety and peace of mind.
Security is mostly a superstition. It
does not exist in nature. Life is either a
daring adventure or nothing.
- Helen Keller |
When danger threatens:
DON’T FREEZE
Pause and accept the presence of fear but utilize
it to promote action.
Sharon had been practicing her personal defense
skills in weekly Bussey Style sessions for months
when, last Mother’s Day, she was assaulted by
four men on her walk home in East Boston. She
froze when she was pushed against a fence and
her mouth covered by the hand of the nearest man.
Sharon froze…for a moment. In fact, it is natural
to freeze with shock and fear; no matter how much
personal defense training one has, we will freeze
if caught off guard by danger. Yet we can reduce
the delay by practice. Sharon’s practice paid
off quickly when she focused, fought back with
confidence and escaped safely.
BE LOUD, BE VERY LOUD
Practice shouting a few times and know that you
can do it. Shout into a pillow if you have to.
Say, "stop", "no", "get
away", or any other command you can think
of. Try it - you will feel great! Shouting is
very much like a physical weapon that gives you
strength and power against an aggressor. Be powerful
and confident.
STRIKE TARGET ZONES
Eyes, nose, mouth groin. Also try pinching, scratching,
poking. Even biting!
You don’t have to worry about whether you’re strong
enough or have good enough ‘technique’ to ‘knock
out’ an aggressor. The goal is to escape, and
everyone has the tenacity and power to resist
right away and fight back effectively. Don’t forget
to stay "hidden" and protected behind
your own hands; hold your hands up by your head,
palms out.
FIGHT TO GET AWAY
Focus on winning, that is, on surviving the situation.
Sharon did it and so can you. Your single purpose
is to escape - escape - escape. You might want
to practice thinking resourcefully: what in your
environment could you use to your advantage? Be
creative be quick to overcome the challenge.
NEVER QUIT
Tell yourself today and now that, "no matter
what, I won't give up! I will resist immediately
and fully until I have succeeded." This is
the best mindset and the sooner you commit to
that decision, the less worry you’ll have.
The most difficult thing is the decision
to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears
are paper tigers. You can do anything you
decide to do. You can act to change and control
your life; and the procedure, the process
is its own reward.
- Amelia Earhart |
Now re-read these principles. Consider for a
moment how do they relate to you specifically
for worries about violence. Re-read them again
and consider more generally how these ideas help
overcome challenges and help achieve other goals.
How could sharing them benefit you, friends, and
children?
The miracle, or the power, that elevates
the few is to be found in their industry,
application, and perseverance under the prompting
of a brave, determined spirit.
- Mark Twain |