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Eternal Sunshine of the Worry-Free Mind
By Alex Iglecia
Published in the Boston Women's Journal and on selfgrowth.com

There are a number of ways of combating worry, one of which is knowledge. A few weeks ago my friend Katrina asked what she can tell her six year old daughter about safety. About strangers. About growing up safely. How would you approach this question?

In Boston, we are very fortunate and privileged to live in relative safety and security. Yet violence is random and can happen at a moment’s notice. My life doesn’t benefit from paranoia, and I believe you would like to be one step closer to worry-free too. Below are five quick tips to consider. Whether for yourself, a child, or a friend, I think you’ll agree that you can apply these ideas to increase personal safety and peace of mind.

Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.
- Helen Keller

When danger threatens:

DON’T FREEZE
Pause and accept the presence of fear but utilize it to promote action.
Sharon had been practicing her personal defense skills in weekly Bussey Style sessions for months when, last Mother’s Day, she was assaulted by four men on her walk home in East Boston. She froze when she was pushed against a fence and her mouth covered by the hand of the nearest man. Sharon froze…for a moment. In fact, it is natural to freeze with shock and fear; no matter how much personal defense training one has, we will freeze if caught off guard by danger. Yet we can reduce the delay by practice. Sharon’s practice paid off quickly when she focused, fought back with confidence and escaped safely.

BE LOUD, BE VERY LOUD
Practice shouting a few times and know that you can do it. Shout into a pillow if you have to. Say, "stop", "no", "get away", or any other command you can think of. Try it - you will feel great! Shouting is very much like a physical weapon that gives you strength and power against an aggressor. Be powerful and confident.

STRIKE TARGET ZONES
Eyes, nose, mouth groin. Also try pinching, scratching, poking. Even biting!
You don’t have to worry about whether you’re strong enough or have good enough ‘technique’ to ‘knock out’ an aggressor. The goal is to escape, and everyone has the tenacity and power to resist right away and fight back effectively. Don’t forget to stay "hidden" and protected behind your own hands; hold your hands up by your head, palms out.

FIGHT TO GET AWAY
Focus on winning, that is, on surviving the situation. Sharon did it and so can you. Your single purpose is to escape - escape - escape. You might want to practice thinking resourcefully: what in your environment could you use to your advantage? Be creative be quick to overcome the challenge.

NEVER QUIT
Tell yourself today and now that, "no matter what, I won't give up! I will resist immediately and fully until I have succeeded." This is the best mindset and the sooner you commit to that decision, the less worry you’ll have.

The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.
- Amelia Earhart

Now re-read these principles. Consider for a moment how do they relate to you specifically for worries about violence. Re-read them again and consider more generally how these ideas help overcome challenges and help achieve other goals. How could sharing them benefit you, friends, and children?

The miracle, or the power, that elevates the few is to be found in their industry, application, and perseverance under the prompting of a brave, determined spirit.
- Mark Twain
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